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Body and Soul and whatever this is
In today's edition of my ongoing struggle with my well-being, I am trying to separate the physiological symptoms from the psychological ones, in the hopes of helping me combat this intense anxiety I am experiencing. Perhaps one causes the other, and I had the relationship backwards. I would much rather deal with physical ailment over a personality collapse, so I am pursuing the theory that I have a problem in my body that my mind is interpreting as a reason to feel anxious.

It worked well throughout the day, while at work and while on my way home. But now, as things grow darker and I feel more alone, I am starting to doubt the validity of this experiment. I don't know how to handle myself, what do to or where to look, and that can't be stemming from just an upset stomach or a creaky back. I feel paralyzed.

Lord, this is so EXHAUSTING, as well, and I would love to try sleeping it off for a couple years. But in the midst of the week like we are, my husband comes home late and I can't just fall asleep the moment he walks in the door. I NEED him. I need to feel him, and talk to him and lean on him ever so much. And I feel so selfish for how much I am taking from him for an issue I just don't understand.